I’ve Fallen And I Can’t Get Up

 

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GONE BEACHING…

 If anyone is looking for me, this is where I will be all week.

Don’t I look relaxed?

If I am able to open my eyes, I will visit your awesome blogs and comment.  If I don’t, it means I was not able to drag my beautifully tanned and incredibly hot body (see above) away from the sun and sand. 

 HASTA LUEGO!

 XOXO

 

 

 

 

 

Long Long Ago, When I Was a Happy Me

As promised, every month I will be changing up my WordPress Theme just to mix it up in an attempt to get out of these damn depressing winter blahs!  I hope you have a foot fetish and like looking at my feet.  If not, too bad (yes, I am very cranky.)

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And that above, is why.

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Depressed Me

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More Depressed Me

I have never ever hibernated as much as I have this winter.  We’re talking not going out of the house for days! I can’t handle it.  My Spanish blood has gotten thinner and wimpier since I turned 50.  It used to endure harsh winters back in the day (for one day) but now, Fuhgeddaboutit!     And to make matters worse, unlike  BEARS, I continue to eat through my hibernation.  

{Insert big swear sigh here}

To me, there is absolutely undeniably NO need for winter.  No USE, no ADVANTAGE, no BENEFIT, no FUN &  no NADA.  I don’t care what you say to try to convince me otherwise because

WINTER = CACA MISERY!!

All I can do is daydream about sunny, breezy, warm and relaxing days with a cool drink or four in my hand.  

That is happiness.   

So Take THAT Polar Vortex!

Happy F****** February 1st!

A Day at the Beach – Another Challenge

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Another fun writing challenge!  A One Hundred Word Challenge for Grown Ups.  This one courtesy of Lisa Cramer: Woman Wielding Words, a wonderful blogger! Check out her great 100 word challenge entry & blog: 

http://www.lisaakramer.com/2013/07/30/conscious-creativity-100-wcgu/

She got it from Julia’s Place @: 

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The roman numeral for 100 is C so let’s make it the ‘Big C’. It can be any topic, any genre but to add a twist, each line must begin with a word beginning with the letter ‘C‘!

 
A Day at The Beach

Come on over and have a seat

Comfort awaits you here at the beach

Climb over the sand dune and hop on by

Careful you don’t drop that good piece of pie

Crabs may nip at your little toes

Crustaceans are among us scurrying on by

Create a sand castle is what I’d like to do

Caution to others, we cannot use glue

Covered in sand we both are now

Counting the shells way down low

Catching the waves is so much fun

Can you surf this next one, my dear son?

Cherish your existence is what I have done.

We Forced Our Teens to Hang Out With Us

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I’ve got myself some pretty nice kids.  They both have a strong work ethic and have had jobs since the age of 14.  They work at the same market a few miles from our home and are fortunate to be getting plenty of working hours to fill their summer days.

It is nice not to have two sleepy, cranky teens hanging around the house all day long, eating everything in sight, watching endless episodes of Honey Boo Boo and telling me how bored they are.  Phew!

Last Friday, I warned informed them that since neither of them had to work that Sunday, we were going to spend the day together as a happy little family and go to the beach.  How awesome does that sound?  

Well, they both chose not to tell me what they really thought of my great idea (smart kids) and gave me a fake (do we have to go anywhere with you and dad) smile.  I reminded them that since one of them is already in college and the other a senior in high school, our vacationing-together days were limited and that we had to take advantage of the time we had now.

Besides, it was the perfect time for me to debut my new shiny blue skirted bathing suit I so agonized over.  I was going to wear that darn thing if it killed me (which it almost did).

Sunday morning came around and we woke the kids up early (just what they want their parents to do on a summer day off).  I packed up lunches for the four of us.  The bread was a bit stale but I figured the peanut butter would mask the staleness and they wouldn’t notice.

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We packed the car like we were going to be away for months, in a remote location with no running water or electricity.  We had to make sure to pack our beach umbrella, 4 beach chairs, paddle ball racquets, a cooler, towels, a beach blanket and about 500 different sun tan lotions which had probably all expired.

We were on the road by 8:15 am which is quite an accomplishment considering we had two cranky teens with us and that my aching stiff body normally does not start functioning until noon.

We were not 100 feet from our home (basically still in the driveway) and the kids were already plugged in.  Out of commission.  Unreachable.  Gone Fishing.  One listening to her favorite country tunes and the other, his alternative screaming, guitar smashing and cursing, noise.  It was clear that we were not to have any kind of family conversation or chit-chat during our two-hour trip.

Lucky for my husband, I turned to him and began chatting away.  If he owned an Ipod, he would have been plugged in before leaving the house so he wouldn’t have had to listen to my array of fun facts I like to enlighten my family with, on trips.  I often read to them from brochures about the places we are about to visit and they…so love to listen.

 Two hours later we had reached our destination.  A beach we had never visited but highly recommended by my sister-in-law.  It was one of those horrendous muggy, sticky, mad hot days and we could not wait to freshen up in the water.

For the love of God.  The entire State was there.  At that beach.  We dragged all our beach paraphernalia through the burning hot sand looking for an empty spot.  A gap between the thousands of people already settled in their blankets and chairs sweating away, was all we needed.  After searching for what seemed like 55 hours, we found a little spot.  Not the prime real estate needed to house all our stuff, but we took it anyway.

After getting some dirty looks from our very close-to-us, sand  neighbors, we settled in.  Ahhhh….finally relaxing at the beach.    My daughter decided to lay down on the blanket but could not get comfortable.  My son was mortified when he noticed that her foot was resting on someone else’s blanket and told her to move.  But there was no place to go.  She returned to her chair in a…not so happy mood.  

We have never been in a beach this crowded.  We often vacation on Cape Cod and have plenty of room to spread out.  It was crazy.  We could hear all the intimate conversations of those around us, could actually read their books right along with them and check their incoming texts on their phones.

We decided to go in the water to cool off.  My cover-up hiding my new skirted suit stayed with me while I waded in the refreshing water.  I got stage fright and could not take it off.  I know I would have blended right in among the massive crowd and that I should be over this skirted suit issue, but I kept the damn cover-up on the whole time.

My kids tried to play paddle ball, but it was an impossible feat being that they had zero elbow room.

After a couple of hours, being drenched with sweat and feeling claustrophobic (and the fact that my kids were hungry because the stale bread didn’t cut it), we decided to head home.

But the day was saved.  We stopped at a famous Clam Shack on our way home and had the most delicious fried clams, fries and onion rings we have had in a long time!  YUM!  

After some very fully satisfied bellies, an air-conditioned car and the fact that we were headed home, everyone seemed happy.  There was a lot of chatter on the way home and we even got a Thank You from the kids for taking them on this day trip!  

It’s amazing what eating good food, will do.   

 

The Swim to My 50s – Eat, Pray, Love, Slurp & Lounge Your Way Through Puerto Rico

I was born in this Enchanted Island back in the early 60’s…

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When I was nine years old, my parents decided to move my three siblings and I from Puerto Rico to a small town in the northeast to live.  Why, you ask?  Believe me, we asked and protested!  It had to do with a wonderful job opportunity for my father.

 It was quite the challenge (to say the least) since we did not know English very well.  But we soon adjusted, learned the language and have stayed in the States ever since.  All except for my mother, who moved back to PR.

Do you know how lucky I am to first, have such a wonderful mother, but also to have her live in this beautiful, spicy, warm and hospitable island?

I try to get there at least once a year, but it does not always work out that way.  However, when I do, watch-out island!  I EAT, pray (really, I do), love, drink, and enjoy every single minute of it.

If you have not been to PR, what are you waiting for?  No passport needed and a quick flight from most major cities!  There truly is something to do for everyone!

images-7 images-8 images-9 images-10 (None of these people are me) 

I am not going to pretend to be one of those tourist sites showing you the major attractions in Puerto Rico.  You can go to, http://www.visit-puerto-rico.com, for that.  

I will be showing you MY experiences in Puerto Rico and let me warn you, they have mostly to do with food!  {LOVE}

Although I stay at my mom’s place in Condado (a wonderful part of the island in San Juan filled with restaurants, hotels and beaches), my favorite place to lounge at is,  The Caribe Hilton.

 

Caribe Hilton Pool

Caribe Hilton Pool

DSCN5600  It’s so tough…being me.

My 'crib' at Caribe Hilton

My pimped-up ‘crib’ at Caribe Hilton

 

Photo on 2013-02-21 at 14.39

Need I say more? Need I say more?

AY! The dragon iguana!

AY! The Dragon Iguana (harmless)

The Hilton has a safe private beach, hammocks, a swim-up bar, drinks delivered to you at your request and, yes, iguanas – but don’t worry, they don’t show up very often.  It is heavenly to lounge around there.  Trust me.  {LOVE}

Now, for some of the most scrumptious food.  It is amazing what one can make with Plantain (looks like a green banana but bigger) .  Check it out:

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Before – Picture. Mofongo! Mashed plantain stuffed with seafood! Total food-gasm!

After Picture.

After – Picture
Yup, I finished the whole thing!

TOSTONES! Fried Plantain

TOSTONES! Fried plantain with a little salt and garlic

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Pinon! It’s like a lasagna except with delicious seasoned ground beef, green beans and plantain instead of pasta. We will kill for this!

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Churrasco with chimichurri sauce, rice and beans, avocado and sweet plantain!

Rice and beans are a must! 183896_1702795364636_8325964_n

Bistec with onions, rice and beans

Steak with onions, rice and beans

How about a grilled cuban sandwich (we borrowed it from that island near by) on a sweet roll sprinkled with confectioners sugar?  Mallorcas! Deliciosas! {LOVE}

Now, for the sweets and desserts:

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Puerto Rican Coffee-Mousse

Piragua de Frambuesa -Raspberry Snow Cone

Piragua de Frambuesa Raspberry Snow Cone

Flan!

Flan! Melts in your mouth.

Guava with cheese

Guava Paste with cheese

These… are just a few of the many wonderful indulgences to enjoy.

Moving right along to the beverages I love to slurp:

Piña Coladas

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Sssssllllluuuurrrrpppp!

 

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DSCN5578 You can learn some history while there…

Other slurpable drinks:

 

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Rum Explosion, with Bacardi Rum made on the island!

You go can visit the Bacardi Rum Factory while there!

Sangria!

Sangria!

Fruity and refreshing!

 

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The best Margarita in town (Super Strong) @ Auroritas

*Have a designated driver when visiting Auroritas.

I know what you are thinking — besides, how fast can you get to PR, why doesn’t she weigh 300 lbs. and will she make it to her 50th birthday?–  You have seen pictures of me eating, loving {everything about PR}, drinking and lounging, but what about praying?   

The truth is, I have no pictures of myself praying.  Only, because praying is a very private affair.  As long as the Big Guy upstairs knows I am praying, that’s all that matters. Right? Oh wait, is He also watching me doing the other stuff?

I hope you enjoyed my little tour and that you plan a trip to Puerto Rico in the very near future!  

Adios & Buen Provecho!