Something Is Broken, Something Is Wrong: A Mother’s Fear

livingoutli.org

livingoutli.org

*****

If you are the mother of a young black man,

I can see your fear.

If you are the mother of a young white man who wants to be a police officer,

I can feel your fear.

If you are the mother of a young black man,

I am sorry for your pain.

If you are the mother of a young white man who wants to be a police officer,

I am also sorry for your pain.

If you are the mother of a young black man in today’s world,

be very afraid.

If you are the mother of a young white man who wants to be a police officer in today’s world,

be very afraid.

If you are the mother of a law-abiding black son,

stay afraid.

If you are the mother of a law abiding white son who wants to be a police officer,

stay afraid.

If you are the mother of a young black man,

get angry.

If you are the mother of a young white man who wants to be police officer,

get angry.

If you are the mother of a young black man you love beyond words,

protect him.

If you are the mother of a young white man who wants to be a police officer and whom you love beyond words,

protect him.

Whether our sons are black or white, we are their mothers,

and we are scared.

Something is broken

Something is wrong

We pray that we can fix it

We pray that we are not alone.

*****

I am terrified.  

My son is a caring and kind young man whose passion is to become a police officer.  He wants to help others.  He wants to serve others.  He is willing to risk his life for others.  

No recent news story has changed his mind.  He is determined to pursue his career of choice.  He may be scared deep down but he doesn’t show it.  

 I am terrified.  

He will be working this summer as a Community Service Officer, supporting the police department anyway he can.  His job is to work with and for the community.  To protect and to serve.  A stepping stone to pursuing his passion once he graduates from college next year.

But you know what?  He needs to do this.  He needs to become a police officer.  He is one of the many good guys.  The ones that care.  The ones that treat others with respect.  One of the ones who values all lives.  One of the ones we need.

I am terrified,  proud and hopeful for change.