HeRp! My First Language Is Rrrebelling!

pic photos.net

pic photos.net

Hola,

As meni of ju no, my firs language ees e-Spaneesh.  

I was born een Puerto Rico an moov tu de united e-states wen I was 9.  

I lern Engleesh preetee queeklee an do not hav an assen, onteel now.  WTH?

De older I get, de more my assen comes aut. Por qué?

Ees my brain gettin laysee?  

Eem I reverteen tu my chylhood?  

Ees de e-Spaneesh een mee rrebeleen?

Meybee my e-Spaneesh ees yelos dat I hav poot Engleesh on de top of my brrain forr ol thees jeers.  

Eet is sayeen tu mee,” NO MAS INGLES, Breekhous! Habla Español!”

 My keeds an hosban, laf at mee ol de tym nau. 

Plos, wen I get mad I nau e-suer een e-Spanish!  Muchos e-suers. CACA!

I feel lyk I hav turrets in e-Spanish.  The e-suers jus com aut a lot.  {Nickles Quarters Dimes!}

Wat am I tu du, ju sey?

NADA!

I weel du absolutlee nada becos dat is jus de wei de cukee crumbles. Qué será, será.

I weel jus embrrais my e-Spaneesh an let eet com aut wen everr eet wans! Viva el Español!

I houp dat ju don hav a hedake after rreedeen dis pos.  

Eet ees achualee gud forr jur brrain tu du dis exsersise.

Sou, eef I see ju an I e-sound lyk Gloria een Modern Fameelee, jus le mee bee.

I lov ju ol!

Jez, I du.

79 thoughts on “HeRp! My First Language Is Rrrebelling!

  1. That was muy funny reminded more of this old show Que Pasa USA? Don’t know if you ever saw it but the grandma cracked me up. I’d like to think it was more this show than that Fuera De Serie chick because Sofia burns me out. But you … you and your eyeball I love. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know what you mean about Sofia being too much sometimes. Too much can get annoying, especially if it’s forced. I can’t do anything about my Mami and her accent. LOL. Glad you love my eyeball, amiga.

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    1. It’s fun over exaggerating the accent. Although, at the rate I’m going, I will sound exactly like that by next month. Thanks for asking about my knee. It wasn’t a good day but hopefully mañana will be better! 🙂

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    1. Jez, mierda! You are quite the french gal! Impressive! When I moved here from PR, I had to take French in the 5th grade even though I had not mastered English quite yet. It was a comical and complete cluster ‘flick’ of different accents mixed in! It was not pretty. Hee,hee.

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      1. My friend and neighbor lived in Montreal and parts of Quebec for a time, so he speaks North American (Quebecois) French, but since he worked in the orchards and fruit processing plants for many years, he picked up Spanish. It took me a while to realize (although it should have been obvious) that he speaks Spanish with a French accent. So, Maria, I can imagine, quite well.

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    2. Ay de mi, la gente de Inglaterra no conoce los hispanohablantes sino los francohablantes (pero hay un poco que habla español, como, Roland Orzabal, nacido Roland Jaime Orzabal de la Quintana de Tears for Fears- que habla muy bien). No hablan español, sino francés, y eso es -solamente- en los que hablan más de uno idioma.

      So much French spoken in Britain, with few exceptions- yes, Roland Orzabal is half Spanish-Basque… his first name was to be ‘Raoul’ but it was Anglicized to Roland. It extends to the Commonwealth nations, too- my friend Jack Yan (living in Wellington, NZ) speaks/reads/writes French quite well, after English, Mandarin and Cantonese Chinese.

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    1. Ha,ha! You know how when I get tired it’s too much effort to speak? Well the Espanol kicks right in without too much effort. It’s interesting how the brain works in terms of languages. I would enunciate better if I had a gin and tonic popsicle. 🙂

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    2. She put up a picture of Sofía Vergara, and I was watching a clip of her on Ellen Generes’s talk show doing a Diet Pepsi commercial yesterday, so, I heard it with a colombiano accent (well, Sofía’s voice, anyways), not so much a boricua/puertorriqueño one. Ay, yi, yi!

      Liked by 1 person

        1. You’ve got a lovely voice yourself, Andra! 🙂 Your “accent” is the frosting on the cake, & I’m sure I will soon say the same for Maria (probably listening to her singing along with that Commodores hit she so loves, hehe)

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        1. Oh de veras? Hablan con mucho cantido? I have yet to perfectly get every country/regional accent- there are such subtle differences at times, you know? But sing-song accents are easier for me to understand.

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      1. I wasn’t so much worried as dying to get something to relieve my pain – but after talking with the Doc, I’m a wee bit worried. Spent the afternoon doing a bunch of different tests. Hopefully results in the next 2 days. Then off to see a G.I. specialist if the tests point one way or another.

        Liked by 1 person

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