The Time I Returned The Christmas Tree

brickhousechick
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I swear, it was mad ugly.  

I cannot even find a photo as ugly as how ugly this tree was.

 I picked it out rather quickly,  I admit.   As it settled in its stand in my living room with its thawing branches glistening and relaxing into shape, it became clear that it was the ugliest tree I had ever seen.  The huge gaps between the branches were wide enough to allow for a large neighborhood of tree houses to be built on it.

My entire extended family was coming in for the holidays and I had to do something about this hideous tree.  I decided that I would string the lights around it, decorate it and fill the holes with extra ribbon and bows.

The thing is that I had purchased it from the nursery my brother-in-law managed and he had not only delivered it to our home but he had set it up for us on the stand.

I tried, I really did but there was no beautifying this ghastly pine.  Mr. B was not pleased,  with me that is.  You can’t just return a Christmas tree!  We bought it, we are stuck with it.  There is no way I am calling my brother and telling him that you don’t like it.

I promised that I would take care of the whole thing and sweet talk my way out of this most awkward situation.  After all, I couldn’t possibly be the only person in this planet to ever return a Christmas tree, could I?

I proceeded to  undecorate it and strip it free from any possible signs of Christmas cheer.  Then, I called my brother-in-law who happened to live right next door, to come over to take a look at the tree in question.  I pointed out every hole, front to back and told him that I could not tell my family that the tree had come from his place of work  because it would give the business a bad name.  Didn’t he want me to have a beautiful tree I could brag about and thus, complimenting his work?

After stating that this was the first time anyone had ever returned a Christmas tree, he took it out of the stand and threw it in the back of his pick up truck and went back to his own house (no doubt, cussing me out along the way.)

The next day,  I returned to the nursery and carefully picked out the most fabulous and beauteous Christmas tree, for all to enjoy.

Please tell me that you or someone you know has returned a Christmas tree.

Lie if you must.

48 thoughts on “The Time I Returned The Christmas Tree”

  2. Nope. Just you.
    I used to buy the first tree we touched at the lot, figuring any holes were the perfect spots for the BIG ornaments!
    I HAVE however, returned a brand new car two days after buying it, and got my traded-in car back….all because I had a “bad vibe” about the new one.
    Now, that’s crazy.

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  5. Oh Maria, I’ve never returned a tree but wish I had. We had one a couple of years ago that barely had any needles left on it by Christmas Day it was so dry and brown. Talk about a Charlie Brown tree 😦 I quite like gaps as I seem to have a lot of heavy and long decorations but the gaps have to be within reason and just right, and of course with graduating fullness. Not much of a tall order then, ha! I hope you get the perfect tree this year. This is serious business after all 🙂

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  6. You’re awesome!

    Nope. I have never returned a tree. However, back in 1988, I did purchase one off the driver of a pickup truck that cruised through a gas station at 6:00 a.m. in the Albuquerque barrio with a load of trees, slowing only long enough to call out to customers before taking my $5, rolling a tree in my direction, and burning rubber down the street. Lucky for me, as I only had $5 that year for a tree. It was a gorgeous.

    But if it makes you feel better, I definitely WOULD return a Christmas tree if I had to. Except not to the guy on the pickup. Didn’t want to think too hard about how he acquired his inventory. . . . New Mexico. A whole other country.

    Feliz Navidad!

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    1. Ha! That’s quite a story, Piper. Better not to know where those trees came from and why the guy was in such a rush. LOL. $5 dollars! That’s worth it. 🙂 I am glad you are supporting me in my crazy decision to return the darn thing! Luckily, my BIL is a nice guy. 🙂

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  7. Um, I wish I could say I returned a tree. But I would have returned that tree. My sister-in-law definitely would have returned it. She decorates trees for people over the holidays and there’s no way she would have allowed that tree to stay.

    I hope your brother-in-law got over it and could laugh about it later. Glad you could get a better tree. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas.

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    1. Thanks, Linda. Glad your SIL would totally understand my predicament and situation, phew! 🙂 This was a couple of years ago and hopefully, he has forgotten about it. I’ve made up for it by taking care of his adorable kids often. 🙂

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    1. I don’t know if chutzpah is the word or just plain crazy! Maybe I knew deep down that my BIL would do anything for me. I helped him out a lot when he went through a very difficult time. 🙂 That’s what family is all about, right?

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  9. Actually… when I was growing up, my best friend’s grandmother (who I adopted as my own) would always buy her Christmas tree from our church. And she would wait until late to pick it. She would pick the one tree that no one else would buy. The one with the hole on one side, or whatever defect that made it undesirable. And it was always decorated with garland and ornaments that came from her many grandchildren.

    That said, I love your balls in taking your tree back to get one that looks great!

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  13. Um, you know here our christmas trees are “hackybush” and such like indigenous trees (torny small bushes with small leaves) Some people have just got dry painted branches as a tree, that is now very fashionable if you are not into the trandishional torny bush…..

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  15. I give you credit, Maria. After decorating a tree and stringing those tangled lights, I wouldn’t have the energy to remove the decorations and haul it back to the nursery. Speaking of sad trees…I haven’t seen Charlie Brown’s Christmas special this season. I hope you picked out a good one this year! xo

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    1. Oh, I hate stringing the lights! No doubt something always goes terribly wrong. I like a lot of lights so it takes me hours. That’s how ugly the tree was that I was willing to go through it again! 🙂 We just picked out this year’s yesterday and my BIL has not delivered it yet. Gulp. We shall see. 🙂

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  17. I have learned that family, sometimes, believes they can “get away with…” 🙂 Anticipating the need to reconsider a sparse selection, I remember my Mom once buying two trees and managing to bind them together. Don’t ask me how she did that.

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  18. Well, I never … have heard of a guy trying to pawn off an ugly tree on his brother and sister-in-law who live next door! How dare he, dastardly nursery owner …

    Good for you sticking up for your rights to show off a gorgeous, full, pine deserving of love, cheer and your reputation, Mrs. B. 🙂

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