Más Español (Spanish Lesson Numero Dos) – How to Get Published

google.com

google.com

Apúrate, Apúrate!

My Spanish class is filling up quicker than my Depends pad – which means it’s overflowing with students chomping at the bits to enroll in this one of a kind state of the art educational and entertaining program.

This is why I have extended the enrollment period and added 500 new slots.  As per the high demand, I wanted to make sure I don’t leave any of you out from experiencing this unique set of lessons.

Here is another preview of the type of pertinent information you will learn to say, en Español .

How to plug your book to an agent

1.  At a Writer’s Conference:  Hola agente, no pierda su tiempo con estas personas inútiles, yo soy la mejor autora aquí’, duh. = Hello agent, don’t waste your time with these useless people; I am the best author here, duh.

2.  While giving your pitch:  Tengo espinaca entre mis dientes?  = Do I have spinach stuck in my teeth?

randomlyedible.com

randomlyedible.com

3.  Mire que lindo es el papel que yo usé para escribir mi manuscrito, me dará puntos por eso?  = Look at this pretty paper I used for my manuscript, do I get points for that?

dreamstime.com

dreamstime.com

4.  El género literario de mi libro es una combinación de erotica mezclada con ciencia ficción con un poco de poesía e misterio y autobiografía.  Si no le gusta, vayase p’al carajo = My book genre is a combination of erotica mixed in with science-fiction with a tad of poetry, mystery and autobiography.  If you don’t like it, go to hell.

Bonus Random Lesson:

Justin Bieber, que tipo de producto de pelo tu usas?  Justin Beiber, what type of hair product do you use?

Stay tuned for Lección Número: 

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google.com

30 thoughts on “Más Español (Spanish Lesson Numero Dos) – How to Get Published

  1. I’ve decided not to publish a book unless someone does absolutely everything for me. Instead I am going to make money off my blog! HA! As for Justin,
    Justin Bieber es una mierda de murciélago loco de 19 años. Al igual que el resto de nosotros estábamos, pero no creció en el punto de luz.
    PS: I cheated.

    Like

  2. This would have come in handy recently.
    Why, just the other day, I was in the alcohol management class with Bieber.
    I knew he didn’t speak English, because he kept saying “que?” to the instructor.

    Like

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