I hate bullies. They can be so cruel and evil and make your life hell. The sad truth is that even at almost 50 years of age, I am bullied almost every day. Wether I step out of my house or not, the Bully is present. He lives with me and will not leave me alone! I have complained to the authorities but there is nothing anyone can do to make him leave me, once and for all!
I am not alone, though. Many people (too many), live with an autoimmune disease where your own body attacks itself! Imagine that? You are going happily along living your life, relying on your presumed healthy immune system to attack any foreign and damaging intruders, when suddenly and often without warning, the rules of the game change! Somewhere along the way, your body gets very confused (WTF?) and decides that you are the enemy. It even goes into overdrive and attacks you with a vengeance! Such betrayal…
I have introduced my own personal Bully (Rheumatoid Arthritis), to readers of this blog in earlier posts. I don’t let him intrude or influence my outlook on life very often except when he reminds me that he is in control! Grrrrr!
The good news is that some days, he does not bother me as much as other days. Don’t know if he’s distracted or maybe hung over from previous attacks, but you can imagine the happiness I feel on those occasions! Sometimes, it’s more of a tease because I falsely believe that I am cured and that my diagnosis is just one big mistake. But soon enough, he wakes up, shakes his head at me and resumes his attacks.
Yesterday began as a tough day. My wrists, hands, fingers and knuckles were complaining. Maybe, I’ve been writing on my blog too often and my joints are not very happy about it. Or, maybe my Bully prefers I stay in bed and do nothing, as he often does. But, I did not let him win.
I decided to take a walk with my 17-year-old daughter who stayed home from school. It was my suggestion. The day was too gorgeous and warm not to enjoy. I figured, my hands were hurting, but not my feet!
It was a wonderful walk. Every single step I took (and there were many) meant the world to me. I never take walking for granted, but instead, see it as an incredible gift. And, to be able to do it with my daughter, even more precious! Take THAT, Bully!
I know that during the next couple of days, I will be hurting. I know that I overdid it yesterday. But, do I regret it? NO WAY!! I will deal with my aching body as I always do, but my mind and spirit feel only joy.