The Swim To My 50s – dAmN GRa-Vi-ty…


Living with two competitive swimmers in the house, I learned a lot about defying gravity when swimming.  My daughter’s coach always emphasized the importance of body position when swimming. The goal is to avoid gravity from pulling you towards the bottom of the pool!  Did you know that your lungs, full of air, act as a buoy wanting to lift your upper torso to the surface?  Pretty cool, huh?

If only the air in our breasts could defy gravity, we’d be golden!  I have lot’s of air in my breasts (or is it fatty tissue?).  Instead of visiting my cousin (the plastic surgeon), perhaps I could just go to the local gas station and fill my breasts with air!  It’s free, quick, easy and has a minimal recovery time.  I think I’m on to something.

This idea came to me after beginning my exploration of my almost 50-year-old body, from my neck down.  I couldn’t help but focus on the inevitable. Hello down there!  Where did you girls go?  Yes, a wonder bra helps, temporarily, but then what?  This reality is definitely a reminder of my mid-life and something I’m going to have to accept.  On September 2, 2013, they will look exactly the same as they do now. Sigh.

After I recover from this realization, I will resume my inspection of my torso.

7 thoughts on “The Swim To My 50s – dAmN GRa-Vi-ty…

  1. LOL! I love it. I had a coworker once describe hers after her second child as two oranges at the bottom of tube socks. While I only had one child, mine have gravitated to that state during the dreaded 40 somethings – and I’m not even half way through that decade yet. Love your perspective on aging!


  2. Dammned gravity. Slow, steady, relentless, all mighty gravity! You’ve convinced me to never, ever… EVER submit to a torso inspection. My somewhat healthy self-esteem and slightly confident, risk taking spin on life could possibly alter… irreparably! A risk I’m not willing to take (you… brave.. me… chicken… NO WAY).


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